As my eyeballs were starting to ache, I decided to take a walk around the neighbourhood around lunchtime yesterday to get some errands done. Lucky for me, my bank is aware of my need for more exercise and has arranged it so that the nearest ATM is a mile away. I must remember to thank them next time I'm at my branch.

It was a bright, brisk day, so I had to wear my sunglasses and leather jacket. Tres chic. For the full effect, I grabbed my MP3 player so I could walk to the groove of Can You Feel It by The Jacksons, Late in the Evening by Paul Simon and Channel Z by the B52s, to name a few. Oh yeah, I know how to party on my way to the bank machine.

I spotted her as I approached the intersection. The short, dark-haired woman was giving off such a strong "super-heaps-o-crazy" vibe that I kept my gaze forward and stared across the street.

Of course, crazy people don't see sunglasses, headphones or not even looking your way as a sign of disinterest. So she tapped me on the arm.

"Do you know how far I had to $#%*ing walk to get this?" She waved one of Toronto's free daily papers in my face. You could pick them up at some bus stops and in all subway stations. The horoscopes are pretty good.

She tapped my arm again. "Three $#%*ing blocks!"

"Oh," I offered.

"I shouldn't have to $#%*ing walk three $#%*ing blocks to get a free $#%*ing paper."

By this point we were walking across the street and she was stuck to my side like a zealous jellyfish. Only less jiggly.

"Well, it is after noon," I offered.

"Hah! So when the $#%* should I be out here getting it, $#%*ing 7 a.m.?"

"Free papers don't sit around all day."

We made it across the street without incident and she took her place in line at the bus stop. I held back my whoop of delight as I kept on heading west.

"You have a good $#%*ing point. I'm sorry about all the swearing," she called after me.

Now that made me shake my head. After all that cursing, she apologizes for it? Talk about crazy.

And because the video is just so $#%*ing horrible, here it is: